why

why am I always thinking about my weight?

why am I never satisfied?

why do I only want what I don’t have?

why do I question every move I make?

why am I always on my phone?

why am I the way that I am?

why do I worry all hours of the day?

…and all hours of the night?

why am I so vain?

why do I always compare myself?

why am I so hard on myself?

why do I give up so easily?

why am I a hard ass?

why am I afraid?

why am I weak?

why am I always wanting more?

why do I question the stars in the sky?

why am I always thinking about my weight?

why do I curate chaos in my mind?

why am I my own worst enemy?

why am I not further along?

why do I underestimate myself?

why am I happy?

…because I choose to be <3

but, why…